🦇🎃👻spookypubes👻🎃🦇

What's on the playlist when it finally happens? "Ding dong the witch is dead" is obv, but "Vengabus" really captures the vibe

We all know who we want to be the third

Muff Gideon

it's naked pushup o'clock

Hugging Piss

face only a mother could fuck

Really, gonna stop now

Canceled for eating rhinoceros pussy

The us dollar is shidding and farding according to major economists

face only a mother could kill

Sam Altman's head exploding, call that an AI bubble burst

I jacked it into your jacket

profligate butthole

fediverse echo chamber aka my gaping butthole

You gotta read different fedi instances in different voices. Fosstodon is Piers Morgan. Beige, Drew Carey. Jorts, the judge from Roger Rabbit after he turns back into a Toon.

bike share should be free

milkshake duck should be a sex act

critical support to the US sucking absolute opossum shit at winning wars

we're love the taste of defeat so much we're gonna spend $1.5T on losing next year

Wilford Brimley's OnlyBrans

gooner union

wash ur butt

smoking that shit that turns your hemoglobin into homo goblins

thank you for your attention to my butthole

I need a new job. I hate being on call for shitting in socks.

Having trouble pulling back the foreskin on the chain I use to lock up my bike

Promo script that's just an excuse to make a fuck scene with L.O.S.E.R. as the soundtrack

Fucksmock nerds doing the new twitter excelling at reading the room, but its the shittiest room you can imagine

I got Babylon 5 on it

@carnitas@jorts.horse I think the only thing people ever liked about him was wearing basketball shorts on the Senate floor? I can do that. Hell, I'll show up in boxer briefs and a rubber pig snout.

My ceiling fan is conspiring to set me up me so I look like a weirdo

pissting on the jeerts dot heerst

oh fuck. oh shit. this is only a 2-day weekend

pot + movie night! What's on?

My googly eyes
Your inner thighs

Staring contest, go

Project Hail Mary is like if a really good Soviet movie was remade my Hollywood jerks

pick n flick butt crumbs

'bated breath

hang the bj

Hairy Plopper