Post by @naga@toot.cat

2026-05-04 17:53 UTC

One other thing I've wondered about has to do with genitals and sexuality. I don't like the looks of any genitals very much, but there's no dysphoria there. I have a powerful kink for orgasm control, and I do not want to entangle these two things. My gender, whatever it turns out to be, isn't a kink and I want to keep that motivation out of it. Enjoying touch isn't gendered, orgasm isn't particularly gendered, and to keep the kink out I don't want to entangle this with those. What I'm looking at modifying in part is ejaculation -- as the "spray" is very much associated with a bio-dick. So the idea is to go without the spray -- with Jalan's cooperation, wearing condoms every time there's a chance I'll have an orgasm. So I can still enjoy the touch, still enjoy the orgasm, but change the most male-coded expression of it. This also lets Jalan control the sensual touch and my orgasms and chastity independently of the condom experiment. I don't know that this will affect my experience of my gender, and I don't even really expect it to. But it's a thing I can try and it's easy and affordable. Even though it's my idea, I am asking Jalan to use her D/s authority to not let me back off from it until and unless she judges it's been solidly tried and doesn't seem to alter anything for me. (2/?) #GenderQuest

Replies (3)

@naga@toot.cat 2026-05-04 17:56

Another limiting factor on #GenderQuest experimentation is that I just can't do much of any personal maintenance myself due to health. I can't shave my beard (or my chest!) because there's no way either Jalan or I could maintain it. I can start letting my hair grow, but Jalan forgot we'd just talked about this and gave me a buzz Saturday when I'd thought we were just trimming my beard. And the beard certainly affects what I can do in the way of make-up. But these are some ideas. (3/3)

Open ##5023689
@naga@toot.cat 2026-05-10 13:23

The order of condoms arrived last Monday, but as of Tuesday evening hadn't come in / been unpacked. The biggest downside I've been concerned about using condoms for potential gender affirmation is I really like sloppy lubes -- oils, silicone, etc. -- especially when masturbating. I'm seldom permitted to orgasm, and less often to masturbate (and use up a lot of Obedience app points when I do), and even asking to masturbate is only allowed on certain days of the week. Wednesdays and Thursdays are not among them. So Tuesday night was basically last chance to get sloppy, at least for months during #GenderQuest, and I asked. Jalan gave permission! It felt good . . . I asked again Friday, to see how it felt with a condom since that was now in place, and got permission again! Still felt good 😀 . And I really don't know how long it's been since I was allowed to masturbate twice in a four-day span. Definitely several years, maybe closer to a decade. Woo! Hashtags follow: #kink #BDSM #FemDom #FLR #chastity #OrgasmControl #OrgasmDenial

Open ##5023701
@naga@toot.cat 2026-05-30 12:40

Edited to improve CW I'm recalling more memories of blocking my ejaculations, as early as my early teens. I don't remember the emotions surrounding them, but it was definitely a thing.

Open ##5023702