#smallstories

"How about I kidnap the dragon," the knight said, "and you come to rescue them?" "It's still the same story," the princess said. "No! We're all subverting-" "I am tired of being in stories," the dragon said. "What?" "If you're not in a story, what even are you?" "I'd like to find out." #MicroFiction #TootFic #SmallStories

"Can I help you?" the magic shop proprietor asked. "What swords do you have?" "Only one, today. This is 'Hyvla', the sharpest sword ever made." "Any conditions on it?" "Before sheathing, the blade must be quenched in porridge or it will dull." "That's inconvenient." "I also have this pot..." #MicroFiction #TootTic #SmallStories

"Are you lost, mortal?" a voice whispered. "I just haven't been here before." "You are in the Forest of Perpetual Gloom." "These are oaks." "Er... Their dense canopy-" "It's autumn. The leaves are falling." "But the days grow shorter, so..." "Perpetual gloom except around lunchtime?" "Yes." #MicroFiction #TootFic #SmallStories

"Here with us tonight is Bob, the first ever neutrino to travel across the universe and loop around." "It depends on how you count. In the first second of the universe-" "After nucleosynthesis. You bounced on atoms?" "Yes, I had a lucky break with a water molecule on a planet called Earth and..." #MicroFiction #TootFic #SmallStories #EvenSmallerStories

The dragon watched the girl climb up to its mountain lair. She stopped to catch her breath, then shouted: "Oi! I've got some questions." "Ask." "Princesses, why?" "They're educated and smell nice." "No noble blood?" "All humans are humans." "Yes! The revolution is go! Cheers!" "Good luck." #MicroFiction #TootFic #SmallStories

On the market day, the witch stopped by all the stalls. "Have a care," she told the tinsmith. "You're getting fuzzy." "What?" "Do you ponder other paths you could have taken?" "All the time." "Shadows of other yous hang on you, making you indistinct. Don't lose the you you are. You're real." #MicroFiction #TootFic #SmallStories

A demon appeared in the summoning circle. It was wearing pyjamas. "I summoned thee to give me knowled-" "Really?" the demon said. "You have the internet these days, the world's knowledge a click away. Nobody's summoned me in years." "You have all knowledge. Why did I summon thee?" "... oh shit." #MicroFiction #TootFic #SmallStories

The princess took an earring off and held it out. The raven looked at it. "Whatever for?" "You are wise and clever. Many princesses have dragons, but none has a raven friend." The raven picked up the earring. "Say no more." "Friends?" she asked when it returned the next day. "Forevermore." #MicroFiction #TootFic #SmallStories

I have been trapped for ages. I grab a door handle; it breaks off. It's chocolate. "Ahaha!" The mad chocolatier's laugh rasps from hidden speakers. "Everything here is made of chocolate!" I stop. Everything? I focus on my fears... They manifest as chocolate monsters. I eat them. "You're free." #MicroFiction #TootFic #SmallStories #Chocolate

"I see you have a new sword," the swordmaster said. "May I have a look?" "No," said the student. "It is a cursed blade. I would only draw this in dire need." "What kind of curse? Must draw blood, or will betray you?" "It will speak, and tell an embarrassing truth about both wielder and opponent." #MicroFiction #TootFic #SmallStories

Her son carefully lifted his ochre-stained hand from the cave wall and studied the outline. "That's me. My hand." He looked at the other hands. "Do you know all?" "Some are older than me." "That old?" "Hush you," she laughed. "We don't make these to be seen tomorrow, but because today, we live." #TootFic #SmallStories #MicroFiction

A spaceship landed in the park. A door dilated. An alien emerged with a chair, which they sat down on, backwards. "Look," they said, "we're not here, okay? You know why nobody contacts you? Because the write-up would be such a pain." They sighed. "Get your shit together, okay? We know you can." #MicroFiction #TootFic #SmallStories

When a wizard dies, their spells unravel. But the pattern lingers a while. When Fitzglob died, other wizards swarmed his tower, trying to find his time-stopper room, which you exited as soon as you entered, no matter how long you spent inside. "Here! This room!" "Why?" "It has a reading chair!" #MicroFiction #TootFic #SmallStories

The entity drifted dreamlessly through space, as it had for aeons. It woke when it neared a star. Scanned for planets, life, signs of technology. Having found all, it analyzed and decoded radio emissions, then composed a message to send. "My hovercraft is full of feels." It resumed dormancy. #TootFic #MicroFiction #SmallStories

Before the annual bonfire was lit, the witch checked it. Five fieldmice and one hedgehog were gently evacuated. Then there were the toxic things. Someone's hatred. Another's regrets. And pain. It was good they were discarded, but if you breathed the smoke... She drew them out, for safe disposal. #MicroFiction #SmallStories #TootFic

"Here," the witch said. She gave her girlfriend a small pearl. "I made it for you." "What is it?" "A small blessing. It can make a small change to you. Just think of what you want and swallow it." "Could it give me wings?" "That's too big." Her girlfriend swallowed the pearl, and began to purr. #MicroFiction #TootFic #SmallStories

"Come out and fight!" the knight called. "Very well," the dragon replied. "As the challenged party, I get to choose weapons. I choose pistols." "What? I have a lance and horse!" "I don't. Here is a matched set, pick one." "Those are cannons!" "Tomayto tomahto. Pick, or forfeit the challenge." #MicroFiction #SmallStories #TootFic

Another master came to see the swordmaster. "Let me watch you teach." He watched a lesson, then asked: "Where do they get their swords?" "Some have their own, others borrow a school sword, like this." "This is an exceptional sword!" "If you have a bad sword, you learn to fight it, not use it." #MicroFiction #TootFic #SmallStories

Opinion polls said they were going to lose, unless someone had a genius idea. "You know the water company that put 'sugar free' on their label?" "All water is-" "But only one said so, implying..." "Genius!" "Who," said their candidate after losing, "put 'I do not eat human meat' on my posters?" #MicroFiction #TootFic #SmallStories

"What are the peasants' demands?" the king asked. "Fair taxes, stronger rights, fewer privileges for nobles." "Bollocks! Send knights out to disperse them." "They have dragons, sire." "What?" "The dragons claim a more equal society is more stable and prosperous." "They hoard countries now?" #MicroFiction #TootFic #SmallStories