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  It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of some stick-on googly eyes.

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  #Monsterdon time, let’s GOOOOO

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  The pump carafe in this hotel breakfast area sounds like Darth Vader breathing, so I cannot be held responsible for my impromptu “I am your father” scene reenactment this morning.

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  Shh. SHHHHH. Tusk by Fleetwood Mac is playing. #SongInMyHead https://youtu.be/ATMR5ettHz8

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  Steadfast Hope Is Terrific #SoHappyItsThursday

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  I just bathed 3 dogs. I’m sweating, but that’s not why my clothes are soaked.

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  Eternal Sunshine Of The Crotchety Mind #GrouchyMovies #HashTagGames

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  Twelve Hangry Men #GrouchyMovies #HashTagGames

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  The Hate-trix #GrouchyMovies #HashTagGames

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  Got some bad news for all you hard of hearing horndogs who keep thinking it’s “erection season”

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  I went to an ASL class public social this evening held in my town by the teacher at the local uni. She’s a Deaf woman whom I’ve known since she was in high school. In fact, I’ve known every Deaf person who showed up tonight for a minimum of 20 years. One, I’ve known for almost 30. Interacting with the students took me back to my first year at the uni, when I met my very first group of Deaf friends. 1989, y’all! I guess time really does fly when you’re having fun. On top of all this, I’m marrie...

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  A shop where you can go to get all your Windows products removed from your computers. Call it DefeneStation

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  When I was a teenager and had a birthday, and my wish was for my adulthood to involve constant screwing, I DID NOT mean like this, and I DID NOT mean by life

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  Starting to think Gromit might be the only one who can save us from the scourge that is AI.

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  Grappa Nuts #IntoxicatingFoods #HashtagGames

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  If people ask me to encapsulate Fedi into two posts, I’d show them one in which a person needed financial help and the response was overwhelming, and one in which someone directly criticized a fantasy artist about the incorrect physics in his 32 year-old painting.

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  When you suddenly realize why your friend Kash wanted *that* rule about FBI disqualifying offenses stricken

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  I’m at the point in life where I believe if you don’t think you’re broken and in need of mending, there’s a 99% chance you’re the problem.

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  Everything reminds me of her

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  I just got word a Deaf friend of mine died today. Rocky and I worked together back in my Vocational Rehabilitation days. He was clever, fun, and single-minded. He was a natural Deaf Interpreter before DI’s were a thing, really. He could get concepts across to the most language-complex people and never once make them feel inferior while he was doing it. He loved his daughter, he treasured his friends, and he made the world better for Deaf people. Thank you for always being yourself, Rocky. Rest w...

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  A talk with a friend this evening has me wanting to remind people of something: if you know someone who’s experienced loss recently, send a message to let them know you’re thinking about them. It doesn’t have to be a grand gesture or some beautiful elegy about the person they lost. Just let them know they’re on your mind, and you’re there to talk if they need it.

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  I’m sorry that, during the morning zoom meeting, I got overenthused and announced that “I’M TAKIN’ THIS DAY TO POUND TOWN!” I realize now the accompanying pelvic thrusts were too much.

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  Thinking about opening a breakfast restaurant called Burnt Toast, and literally serving burnt toast with every meal. I’ll have a YouTube channel and TikTok featuring people complaining that they’re toast is burnt, and the servers just turning and pointing to the sign that says “BURNT TOAST: The Toast Is Literally Burnt”

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  Home gym workout #3: an actual workout. I broke a sweat and everything, y’all. My brain is already calculating the cost of each workout, and each consecutive use means less and less money wasted. Galaxy Dadbrain!

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  PINS!

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  I woke with America’s Ventura Highway in my head, so there’s that. #SongInMyHead https://youtu.be/E-BaXyirqi4

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  At the zoo and pronouncing leopard like “leotard” around the big cat expert

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  Home gym workout #2: assembling the home gym.

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  Me: *works all-day job* okay, that’s one day of our vacation Me: *works another all-day job* that’s another day of our vacation Me: *works a two-day job* okay, that’s airfare for us Me: *works a three-day job* okay that’s half a tank of fuel for the compact car we’ll drive on our vacation

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  Here’s another periodic reminder that Alexander Graham Bell was a eugenicist bastard.