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  I might as well take advantage of my current area of residence and learn 3 gun

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  Mystery comcast equipment showed up at my door addressed to someone who has never lived at this house. I called their service number and they just went oh weird anyway could you return that equipment to our store? I would never use Comcast’s after they sucked ass so much in Dallas, then we moved and had glorious Time Warner Road Runner broadband for a year, but then TWC and comcast swapped markets and then they sucked even more ass for the next 20 years.

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  Also, I’m trying to fix my gas range’s oven. It won’t stay lit which makes me think it’s the thermistor. It’s fine on the oven side, so I need to check the connection on the control side. The service guide only unhelpfully tells me to remove the knobs and fascia, only it doesn’t tell me how to even get this fucking thing off.

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  Titanfall 2 got a VR mod and it looks so fucking sick. Really wanting to get past the steam frame waitlist

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  We moved this year to a house with a much smaller yard, so we’ve been offloading our excess planters because we don’t have the room for them anymore. Please people, if you’re coming by, and picking up these ceramic planters, and you’re paying publicly through Venmo or Zelle, I implore you to make the description read something other than just “pot”.

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  Been seeing more flock cameras with poles cut, dragged to nearest ditch, and solar panels smashed. Three this week alone. My wife audibly celebrates when we spot a new one

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  “Hey”, said the tech bro after hogging the bong, “what if, to alleviate the traffic in car packed cities… what if we added even more cars to the road, only they’re empty”

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  Hell yeah, new pebbles came in

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  Meet the new Starfox, same as the old Starfox

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  Every time I get one of those “You appeared in x number of searches on LinkedIn” emails, I just know they’re like the random video suggestions that show up on YouTube that have literally nothing to do with what you typically want to watch.

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  I’ve only ever watched up to the third episode of Bakemonogatori. Why the fuck do I have Renai Circulation stuck in my head?

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  Me: looks up some info about one of the bastards constantly in the news Oh, god damn it, we share a birthday? Different years, but still.

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  I hate tiling, but I can work a tile saw like you wouldn’t believe

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  Whose bright idea was it to let electrons follow logic paths anyway?

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  “If we all turn up at the midterms we can just vote this out!” “What can we do without resorting to violence?” “Once the democrats take back over, then they’ll really be sorry.”

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  I refer to any restaurants that stay open past midnight as “Oh boy, 3 AM!” E.g. wife and I working into the morning hours, getting hungry “Do you want to Oh boy 3 AM?” Usually that means fast food, but we recently found out there’s a 24/7 ramen joint 10 minutes from our new house that has an actually spicy bowl. That’s our new oh boy 3 am.

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  lol, my wife watches so much anime that she thinks Japan is a real place

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  I am so fucking tired of seeing Gen Z content creators clipping their fucking DJI lapel mics to random shit and holding them like a handheld. Sometimes they clip the lapel mic to another lapel mic. Sometimes they clip the lapel mic to their lapel and hold a random object. Sometime they clip the lapel mic to their lapel and hold a random object with another lapel mic clipped to it.

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  So, bizarre story. My wife went to school with this girl. She (wife) had gone to a school play her freshman year. This girl was the lead. My wife said her performance was something that actually changed the trajectory of her life. She got involved with theater after that, and became friends with this girl. She was certain that if anyone at her school was going to be famous in ten years, it would be that girl. The girl went to a famous art college to study acting. Ten years later, my wife has a...

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  Sometimes I legitimately forget that people literally believe in religion for real.