@The_Picard_Maneuver@lemmy.world
2026-10-28 13:25 UTC
Replies (32)
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@FjordDan@lemmy.zip 2026-10-28 13:38
John is an asshole. Cindy is clumsy. Ethan provide a vital release of pent-up anger and frustration with the leadership.
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@flamingo_pinyata@sopuli.xyz 2026-10-28 13:49
Ethan is not touching you in any way, he’s just doing his own thing, so the answer must be A or B. Depends if you hate Cindy or John more.
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@VicksVaporBBQrub@sh.itjust.works 2026-10-28 14:12
John compared your promotion to cooked meat and is laying hands on you without warrant. John is harassing. Cindy is on the clock and working. No complaints filed on her behalf regarding any cramped or confirmed work conditions. Cindy is doing well. Ethan was contracted to clear a stuck pig diagnostic tool inside a petroleum industrial mainline pipe. He called for traction materials to his teammates so he could safely navigate thru the extreme challenging environment. Ethan is doing his job well.
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@SavinDWhales@lemmy.world 2026-10-28 14:12
Dang. Is it this time of year again?
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@saltnotsugar@lemmy.world 2026-10-28 14:14
SALT THE SNAIL!
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@RumorsOfLove@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2026-10-28 14:16
John put them up to this to combat the old meme
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@BeatTakeshi@lemmy.world 2026-10-28 14:32
Oddly specific
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@Hudell@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2026-10-28 14:34
Word around the office is you got a fat cock. I got a fat cock too. Maybe we should rub our fat cocks together sometime. Maybe a little oil?
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@sundray@lemmus.org 2026-10-28 14:42
Don’t touch me, John.
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@rumba@lemmy.zip 2026-10-28 15:16
Ethan covered himself in oil It must be Wednesday; I could never get the hang of Wednesdays… --Douglas Adams
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@TomMasz@piefed.social 2026-10-28 16:36
0 to 60 in three choices.
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@superduperpirate@lemmy.world 2026-10-28 16:38
This reminds me of employee orientation I went through at an old job. There were videos on the usual things like sexual harrassment, workplace/industrial safety, etc. The video on racial discrimination actually had some examples of what not to do. What I remember was a white employee asking a black employee about why do mexicans always drive low riders, the black employee was all idk, white employee says “it’s so they can pick lettuce without having to get out of the car!”, and both laughed hysterically. Those of us in the training room were looking at each other like ummmmm wtf?
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@meme_historian@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2026-10-28 16:46
Ya know, at least Ethan isn’t touching you
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@DupaCycki@lemmy.world 2026-10-28 16:59
You would not believe how many trainings like this one I completed with a score close to 100% just by picking the longest answers.
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@texture@lemmy.world 2026-10-28 18:59
none of these are harassment?
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@Sunnshine@sh.itjust.works 2026-10-28 19:02
He’s a bad little slug. 😏
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@leftzero@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2026-10-28 20:53
Obviously A. Ethan didn’t touch me, and Cindy only on accident. Also I wasn’t promoted, so that pervert John must be insinuating that he can get me promoted in exchange for unspecified “services”. I wouldn’t feel safe around him.
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@NotASharkInAManSuit@lemmy.world 2026-10-28 22:05
Hey, John, keep your gods damned hands to yourself you fucking creep. Hope you have a good attorney.
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@skooma_king@piefed.social 2026-10-28 22:18
A. Clearly, A.
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@Valmond@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2026-10-28 22:53
I got one once where you got an email (when sending “fun” emails was a thing) with a racist joke. What to do?? A) report Etc. C) forward to the team D) forward to the team, But only of it was really funny 😬
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@Unique_Emerald_Sol_I@sh.itjust.works 2026-10-29 00:52
Dropping this without context
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@chronicledmonocle@lemmy.world 2026-10-29 02:29
I know this is a joke, but what the actual fuck is that slug story. I am laughing my ass off reading it 😂.
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@Agent641@lemmy.world 2026-10-29 05:49
Ethan didn’t touch me without consent.
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@WorldsDumbestMan@lemmy.today 2026-10-29 05:55
All of this.
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@Someonelol@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2026-10-29 05:56
C isn’t harassment it’s just a nervous breakdown at work. The guy doing unsolicited touching on the other hand…
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@ILikeTraaaains@lemmy.world 2026-10-29 06:49
John is the boss and old, he just grew in another time. Ethan is that weird guy that the company cannot afford to lose at any cost. Evidently it is Cindy, and she will claim she was the victim, make false accusations and go on twitter. /s
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@sumsinj@lemmy.world 2026-10-29 07:19
These comments got me confused, yes John touches someone on the back, but like the back isn’t sexually motivated?? All the answers are not harassment perse, at least not without some extra context. But when I read the comments I think that you all are just extra touch sensitive (possibly because of some worse experiences or with extra context, which is fair - don’t get me wrong)
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@bstix@feddit.dk 2026-10-29 07:26
In real life, work harassment often looks like B. How many times has Cindy “accidentally” spilled coffee over you? She’s just so clumsy lol lol.
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@Colloidal@programming.dev 2026-10-29 10:46
None of those are harassment. You’d need to repeatedly ask them to stop (and them failing to do so) to configure harassment.
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@melsaskca@lemmy.ca 2026-10-29 12:18
I’ve lost count of how many “Ethan’s” I’ve worked with over the years. /s
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@CAPSLOCKED@lemmy.world 2026-10-29 12:42
once had a guy open his pants, tuck his penis down between his balls, turn it sideways 90 degrees, and called it a ‘hamburguesa’ military was interesting
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@zoltanshields@lemmy.zip 2026-10-29 15:24
I’m not a big fan of Ethan but he’s the only one who knows how key aspects of our network architecture works and he does get back to his desk faster if you salt him.