@JessTheUnstill@infosec.exchange
2026-09-26 22:29 UTC
It'd be kinda embarrassing for everyone if the only holy relics that worked to fight vampires were ones from the Gnostics. "Oh fuck, the orthodox were all wrong! We're all going to have to upend our entire Christian religion if we want to survive this!"
Or worse. Scientology.
Or one very specific denomination. The only ones who can fight vampires are pastors of the Upper Cumberland Presbyterian Church. Somehow.
Replies (3)
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@Aviva_Gary@noc.social 2026-09-26 22:30
@JessTheUnstill@infosec.exchange Write this book... also shut up and take my money 🤑
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@GenXotaku1971@urusai.social 2026-09-26 22:31
@JessTheUnstill@infosec.exchange or Appalachian snake handling churches....that's good horror-comedy there....
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@dr_a@mastodon.social 2026-09-26 22:33
@JessTheUnstill@infosec.exchange mid-western church potluck as the ultimate vampire deterrent… The power of cream of mushroom soup compels you!