Post by @Mickey7@lemmy.world

Fuck off even harder than I ever did, enjoy bikes and the woods and frogs and friends and arcades even more (if that’s possible). Then in the 90s, invest in stocks, real estate, more stocks, then bitcoin.

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@dasrael@lemmy.zip 2026-10-13 05:08

go back to sleep, too early for that bullshit.

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@Viking_Hippie@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2026-10-13 05:36

That depends: am I my current age or the age I was in 1983? Seeing as I was born on the penultimate day of 1982, I wouldn’t have a lot of choices if it’s the latter 😁

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@Varesti@lemmy.zip 2026-10-13 05:51

Wait 3 years and tell my mom to get an abortion.

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@HootinNHollerin@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2026-10-13 05:57

Jork it to some bush tri folds then look for a t top

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@Mongostein@lemmy.ca 2026-10-13 06:22

Say “why’s it so dark in here?” from my dad’s nutsack

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@Tiral@lemmy.world 2026-10-14 03:34

I was born in 1983, so everything?

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@NotSafeForWorld@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2026-10-13 23:35

Perfect, I didn’t exist yet. I’ll stop my parents from having me

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@RevolverSly@lemmy.world 2026-10-14 03:39

Cool! Hard reset

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@Polisheocket@lemmy.zip 2026-10-14 03:44

I wasn’t born yet, but I’d invest every dime I could, I’d be retired by 40 and travel the world, play golf, fish and enjoy life

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@chunes@lemmy.world 2026-10-14 03:50

Just in time to keep my parents from making me :D

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@ikidd@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2026-10-14 04:08

Sell my hockey cards and buy Microsoft.

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@Krudler@lemmy.world 2026-10-14 04:11

Write a letter to the lead singer of Anvil, tell him that it’s time to give it up & hire a fucking songwriter.

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@FreshParsnip@lemmy.ca 2026-10-13 22:47

Find evidence of Trump’s crimes and try to get him convicted, or at least discredited, before people even think about electing him

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@sanzky@lemmy.world 2026-10-14 06:49

buy bitcoin

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@Greystripeycat@lemmy.today 2026-10-14 06:34

Run away from home, go to a large coastal city. Fake up a head injury, play the amnesia card. Bide my time. Finish school with stellar grades, get a scholarship. Take my same degree, network better. Graduate, get the dream job I wanted originally. Invest, retire early. Disappear.

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@58008@lemmy.world 2026-10-14 09:19

My instant and extremely violent suicide would go down in history. They’d write songs about the cloud of bone talc I’d disappear into like a jihadist ninja. Studies would be performed to discover just how finely my corporal form was disassembled, firing my few remaining atoms around the Large Hadron Collider with such force that I break free of time and space and enter the 4th dimension, but even the 4D scientists living there will have no clue how I managed to die so fucking thoroughly.

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@itsjustachairmary@lemmy.world 2026-10-13 22:00

Fucking panic, try to get a life together, and watch the whole world lose their complete shit at 9/11 again. But like. I’ll buy popcorn this time you know.

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@StoneStar@feddit.nl 2026-10-14 08:27

Assuming my wife would be gone so I’d probably grieve for a very long period. Or is there a way to go back? Or is she there too? MARIE??? WHERE ARE YOU MARIE???

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@WorldsDumbestMan@lemmy.today 2026-10-14 09:23

Not exist I guess.

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@Rumo161@feddit.org 2026-10-14 06:46

A lot of people think they can change the world in major ways from the past but not in the present around here again.

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@hansolo@lemmy.today 2026-10-14 10:55

Other than Save Sara Connor, engine has this wrong. Faking an identity is easy. Back then it was all paper, and for Americans, SSNs were only just barely standard. Say you grew up in some rural bumblefuck place and sign up for everything fresh. Full Tara Westover story would work. Next, find your grandparents. Convince them you know them from something through a friend they’ve mentioned to you and crash on their couch long enough to get a basic job, then apartment, car, and grow a moustache. Which should take about 3-4 weeks. Restist your mom’s advances and attempts to take you to a high school dance. Next, get to the west coast and start selling and buying up real estate. Buy and sell Hollywood back to itself until 1988. Then start buying real estate in New York. On the side, buy stock in all the classic tech companies, Nintendo, and in the military industrial complex. By 1993, you’d be a millionaire. From there, do whatever you want. Buy early and sell AOL stock. Blackberry. GE. Then do good things in the world. Pull the fire alarms in the WTC at 8:45am on 9/11. Get a certain orange therapy so he stays with Ivanna for the kids. Invent Paypal first and steal the other half of it from Peter Thiel. Convince Woz, Gates, and Jobs that the future is in open source software. Find Linus Torvalds and mail him a billion euros. The morning before the Citizens United decision, bribe Clarence Thomas to abstain and pull the fire alarm. Mail Bernie Sanders $52 every week, anonymously. Get the pilots of Pam Am 103 super hammered the night before so the fight gets cancelled. Organize a London public transit boycott for 7/6/2005 lasting 3 days. Find the people that cancelled Firefly and murder them, wear their faces as a mask, and make sure the series goes at least 5 seasons. You know, chill stuff like that.

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@whoisearth@lemmy.ca 2026-10-14 11:08

Enjoy my childhood again. I have no major regrets in life and I’m happy. Why fuck that up?

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@TrackenDaKracken@lemmy.world 2026-10-14 11:10

Not knowing the specifics of how this game works, but assuming I’m 17 again and everything is the same as it was, I go to my first GF’s house and… yeah. Because that was one of the best years of my life. I hope the game is that I get to live my life over from that point, knowing everything I know now, because I would do a lot differently.

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@LemmyThinkAboutIt@lemmy.zip 2026-10-14 11:28

I’d still be in the womb so… Try and get the umbilical chord to wrap around my neck.

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@TrackenDaKracken@lemmy.world 2026-10-14 11:43

To me it seems, even if we were plopped down into the moment and everything is again exactly as it was, that from that instant forward things would change. Nothing would play out the same way, and the farther we moved along the timeline from that point, the more things would be different. Five years after you arrive, it’s a very different world from the one you knew before, or read about. It’s chaos theory. So, the idea that one could shape the future, by stopping expected future events is silly, apart from the immediate future around the instant you appeared, but good luck remembering any of that, if you were even alive then before. Everything will spin off in different directions on a second pass, nothing will play out the same exact way. The really big things like the climate issue and the eventual fall of USSR are still going to happen, but no one will listen to you, same as today. There might still be a big terrorist attack around 2001, but exactly what and where will be unknown to you, but more likely it will be years before or after, or not at all. Lottery numbers won’t be the same, there won’t be the same companies on the stock market. The knowledge about the future-past you experienced is useless. The only thing that helps is your knowledge about life’s universal principals, and a better understanding what you do and don’t want for yourself. Your life will be different, because you’ll be able to make better choices, but everything else will be different too.

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@melsaskca@lemmy.ca 2026-10-14 11:59

I’d put out what I can remember of ‘Graceland’ and beat Paul Simon to the punch.

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@Wispy2891@lemmy.world 2026-10-14 12:19

Weird, this image has all the artifacts like if it’s on its 30th screenshot&repost, but I never saw it before

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@tigermountain@lemmy.world 2026-10-14 12:30

After kind of freaking out I’d remember all the information I’ve accumulated over my previous lifetime and be pretty happy. I’d know what the future holds and use that to my advantage.

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Replies (36)