2026-10-21 04:59 UTC
Replies (20)
-
@PotatoesFall@discuss.tchncs.de 2026-10-21 06:11
It’s AI, not heroin. Hating AI is great but shouldn’t lead all the way to serious relationship trouble IMO, as long as she doesn’t use LLMs to talk to you directly or something. You can try to understand why she uses it and how it helps her. You can also tell her it feels wrong to you or bothers you that her work is done with AI, or that you don’t want to read it, but at the same time you can still accept that it’s working for her. Dogma doesn’t fair well in relationships
-
@kingofras@lemmy.world 2026-10-21 06:22
You make a fair few judgments there. A relationship doesn’t mean you get to control each other’s behaviour. I digress. What I’m curious about is I said how there can’t be ethical AI and any use of it is harmful. That’s pretty blanket. Did you mean just LLMs or all forms of AI?
-
@Culminate@lemmy.ca 2026-10-21 06:30
You don’t need to ignore it. She should understand your stance on AI. You don’t need to come off strong with pure hatred, but she should understand your dislike of AI. On the topic of her homework, keep it light. You don’t need to fixate on it, just say it looks good (if it does). I don’t know if you can help her reduce her usage. Maybe someone else here can figure that out.
-
@preussischblau@lemmy.ca 2026-10-21 06:32
Shift it from a merely theoretical conversation about the negatives of AI to a personal, relationship-focused conversation. Make it clear to her that it would mean a lot to you, personally, if she could make that change or at least open a discussion about why she continues to use it.
-
@AlfalFaFail@lemmy.ml 2026-10-21 06:32
She is caring, cute, clever and really thoughtful. I love everything about her. Accept her for who she is. If you can’t, move on.
-
@Grimy@lemmy.world 2026-10-21 07:10
She agrees with me every time and says she will decrease her usage but at the end she uses it still. How often are you “explaining” to her the dangers of AI? Honestly, yes, just ignore it. Outside looking in, you sound tedious and mildly controlling.
-
@Th4tGuyII@fedia.io 2026-10-21 08:05
Honestly I get you, I hate the world GenAI is making... but you can't control what your partner does. You've told her your stance on AI, and that you don't like how dependent she is on it - but it's her decision and responsibility as to whether she acts on what you've said. If her rampant AI use is a deal-breaker to you, then act on that. Otherwise, if she refuses to stop - then it'll have to be something to disagree on. Draw the line on things you do together.
-
@jbloggs777@discuss.tchncs.de 2026-10-21 08:23
Your passion for the well being of your girlfriend is admirable. Are you in a position to collaborate on a project with her, to challenge yourselves and increase your understanding? I’m sure that the lecturers/teachers will be tailoring their subjects in light of AI already. So I wouldn’t focus there, but on collaboration and real world problem solving … something that won’t kill the relationship either! My own experience MANY years ago showed me that around 2/3rds of my classmates had only superficial understanding of the topics at the time (note: I was a geek, and was often well ahead of the course material, and I was bored in most classes as a result). Some really struggled but persisted (much respect to them!), while others left or switched. I’m sure most of my class ended up in gainful employment and benefited from their studies regardless. I suspect that those who enjoyed a good working life are those who could collaborate well, who could talk with their colleagues and explain their viewpoints and positions, and listen and understand others viewpoints as they worked toward shared solutions to real world problems.
-
@FoxAlive@lemmy.zip 2026-10-22 05:18
Yeah ignore it. Really if it bugs you that much I would do something about it, but that feels dramatic to me. But I’m not in your shoes and I don’t know your moral compass or how annoying this girlfriend is with her ai use. This is really a you issue though and I would not ask peoples advice, and if you wanted real advice I wouldn’t ask the anti ai space for one. I can tell you though, there’s tons of things I can tell you about my partner and what they do and how it bugs me. Every time they use our stove I say never put it above 6 just give it time. And everytime we Cook the stove is blasted on full. I could get up set and argue about it which I did for a short period of time. But clearly they aren’t going to change and I’m being obnoxious about it. That doesn’t mean i don’t love them, its just a balance of learning eachothers quirks and embracing them rather than making things more adversarial than it needs to be. But again I can’t draw those lines for you, you can’t ignore something that really bugs you.
-
@SCmSTR@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2026-10-22 05:38
She’s a STUDENT? Why the hell would you cheat as a student? That seems incredibly counterproductive
-
@CultLeader4Hire@lemmy.world 2026-10-22 06:48
Aside from the AI subject just agreeing with you everytime, then not changing, is a form of fawning. It’s avoidant, it usually comes from a disorganized attachment style. I only bring this up because this isn’t really about AI it’s about her behavior around it and taking inventory on the relationship and each partners attachment style can help communication, understanding and decision making.
-
@majster@lemmy.zip 2026-10-22 07:18
Eh you are overreacting. But one thing is crucial, is she using any proprietary software out of her own volition?
-
@ZILtoid1991@lemmy.world 2026-10-22 07:20
Try to look up guides on helping people out of AI dependency.
-
@m3t00@lemmy.world 2026-10-22 07:36
wife developed a tictoc/youtube habit but actually does many of the subjects she watches; gardening, cooking, sewing, etc. I can’t stand the snail’s pace of information from most videos and have to skip around. she also asks her phone AI for details like ‘how to plant tomatoes?’, which gives an acceptable answer, I guess. I’m RTFM old school and look up such things starting from an index. skip around a lot. I’ve tried asking questions but AI always misunderstands my questions, so I don’t use it. If she can make money working with an LLM, it will be okay. I wouldn’t want to be the first to operate any machine designed that way.
-
@LeftReddit2@lemmy.world 2026-10-22 07:39
Have you explained to her why you’re against LLMs? How they work? This is how I got some of my friends to stop using ChatGPT or Character.ai When you peek behind the curtain and see these are just algorithms, at their core, they become a lot less impressive. If nothing else, at least push her to use Local AI models using something like ollama or odysseus or LMstudio. This helped get one other friend off AI because, guess what, running this on your own machine makes you feel the consequences of it.
-
@moldy_rice@piefed.keyboardvagabond.com 2026-10-22 03:53
Replace “uses AI” with “is an alcoholic” and follow similar advice.
-
@Goldholz@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2026-10-22 07:53
I also have ADHD and dont use AI. What i do with my partner who also uses AI to do stuff on their website or the server, and when ever I call them out for it, they get defensive. So i just ignore it now. It is not a thing i want to throw the relationship away for
-
@nandeEbisu@lemmy.world 2026-10-23 00:27
Unpopular opinion, but I think the degree to which AI doomerism plays out feels like Internet purity culture. Eating meat or non-fair trade coffee and chocolate is unethical, driving a car, buying electronics with slave labor mined rare earth metals all do active harm to the world. I feel like moderate AI use to save time isn’t a huge deal. Text generation is fairly cheap and not that harmful at small scale, if you’re running a swarm trying to solve millennium prizes that’s a much heavier lift. There is danger in missing out on learning and developing core instincts and judgement when you outsource some of that to AI, but asking it to find something in a disorganized readme or something like that isn’t a huge deal.
-
@rebelsimile@sh.itjust.works 2026-10-21 11:04
Hey here’s something you should probably hear: You’re wrong. You claim there’s no ethical use of AI, yet you don’t ever actually prove that claim. Your GF sits there, ethically using it in front of you and you can’t see it because your ideology blinds you. You literally ran to the fuck_ai forum for ideological relief. It’s kind of pathetic. Leave your GF alone.
-
@DriftingLynx@lemmy.ca 2026-10-21 15:30
Using it for school work is demonstrably not learning. In fact using an LLM is antithical to learning: it’s cognitive offloading. If she cares about actually learning she’d do her own school work. That’s the problem I see here… my 2¢